After visiting a strange backwater prime world Altah'Na Szchazek an arcanoloth mage has recently launched a new product aimed at younger mortals, Pocket Familiars or Pokemars. These strange and obviously magical beasts are stored in small magical red and white balls and bond almost instantly to the first person to free them as a sort of pseudo-familiar. Unlike a real familiar, these pokemars are easily un-bonded with their masters and it is possible and even encouraged to own several. Each one is sold in its own basic magical storage ball, but the fiend also sells better more expensive balls that are capable of holding many of these strange creatures. Also unlike a real familiar is the practice that goes along with the pokemars of dueling. Most pokemars come with a reasonable ability to defend themselves and attack others and their masters are encouraged to pit their creatures against other pokemars to hone and improve their ability. Furthermore if the creatures are put through enough battles and win enough times they will "evolve" changing physically into another "higher level" version of their type adding greater strengths and new special powers.
Our resident mage has taken the time to study these children's toys to see more closely what they do. The creatures seem to take on the alignment of their current master and we could not find any evidence that either the creature or their storage balls would have any detrimental effects on their young masters. However what we did find that was mildly concerning is the alarming tendency for addiction. On some primes where the loth has marketed these balls we have seen entire cities where almost every child has at least two or more of these creatures and where many children leave home for the only purpose of collecting more and training their creatures to fight other creatures.
Another controversy surrounding the Pokemar is the current court battle in Sigil between Szchazek and an Aasimar mage by the name of Hazerbaro who has been enchanting and selling similar creatures with decidedly good tendencies. The loth is sueing for infringements on his personal invention and is seeking a high percentage of the mage's profits. The mage claims that his creatures are designed to counter the fiendish influence produced by the arcanaloth's products and that the idea is not original pointing to more normal familiars and mephitis as prior art. In the last couple of days a cloud of mephitis have gathered of all varieties, putting aside their differences to protest outside the court house. Brawls have broken out on the fringest of the cloud and the streets have become clogged with spectators. Bets can be taken at the following locations…
Pokemar - A fiendish conspiracy?
my that's wow but are these just creatures from the manuals or tottly new critters 
:
They would be entirely new creatures.
What surprises me about this is the fact that no one had thought of it sooner :roll:.
I'm sure someone probably did. Who cares. It is a joke.
That's pretty funny, yet intriguing at the same time. Has anyone converted Pokemon...err, Pokemar into d20 stats yet? I think D&D familiars could use a boost from something like this. I've tired of ravens and wolves and imps and mephits...
Then again, there's the storage problem.
--> http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=1
Then again, there's the storage problem.
--> http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=1
How about humans then?
Good ol' human familiars for fiendish or draconic arcanists of awesome ability. Nifty 
.
That's great, except I stumbled upon a part of the site that MAN WAS NOT MEANT TO KNOW:
"The Book of Vile Darkness Pokemon Web Enhancement?" "Slavery and Pokemon?!" "Mutilating Pokemon!?!?!"
OH. MY. GOD. :shock:
Incidentally, I saw a link to some Summoner rules by Eco-Mono, but the link was dead. Do you have that somewhere?
.Human familiars for fiends. Also known as snacks.
Reminds me of a fiendish spell I once wrote up...
Summon Snack I
Conjuration (Summoning) [see text]
Level: Brd 1, Clr 1, Sor/Wiz 1
Components: V, S, F/DF
Casting Time: 1 round
Range: Close (25 ft. + 5 ft./2 levels)
Effect: One summoned snack
Duration: 1 round/level (D)
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No
This spell summons a living extraplanar creature (typically a human or demihuman native to a prime material plane). It appears where you designate, properly garnished, basted and fattened up. It tries to escape immediately, running away to the best of its ability. If you can communicate with the creature, you can taunt and toy with it.
The spell conjures one of the creatures from the 1st-level list on the accompanying Summon Snack table. You choose which kind of snack to summon, and you can change that choice each time you cast the spell.
Sadly, a summoned snack cannot summon or otherwise conjure another snack, nor can it use any teleportation or planar travel abilities.
Arcane Focus: A gilded fork and knife.
For a more amusing luncheon, try Summon Snack II, III and IV. Summon Snack V should be reserved for special occasions, when you have time to truly savour the kill.
OH. MY. GOD. :shock:
so any thing is fair game in pokemar my do you also wager the critters how evil how evil
You know, those rules are actually pretty interesting. I always thought the rules of summoning were botched in D&D. By the time you could summon something, it was always less powerful (in combat power anyway) than an equivalent-level offensive or defensive spell. It never seemed worthwhile.
D&D needs some sort of sacrificial ritual-type spells that could be prepared beforehand that summoned quite powerful creatures, but you would have to bargain with them, plead your case, offer bribes or threats, or pledge bits of your soul ala Elric's lord Arioch. Then it would be more interesting.
A greater variety of micro-monsters, suitable for non-combat tasks, would also encourage summoning. That's why the pokemon idea, although it seems childish at first glance, is actually worthwhile if someone makes a more serious version of it.
poekemar servants would be handy for thoese times when you triying to escape from a cell
They'd be extremely useful for the casual planehopping kender handler.
Imagine how many curious incidents these little folk could perpetrate with a bag fun of pokemars.
Here is some of the inner workings of Pokemar or the lesser familiar fad.
First of all, Altah'Na Szchazek , the fiend that introduced the Pokemar for sale on the planes is using a set of unique spells to mix and match parts and essence from a variety of creatures. The base creatures he starts with are usually imps, mephitis, quasits, and the occasional lantern archon or other similar creature.
Step 1 is to take one or more of these creatures and beat them into unconsciousness so that they are more docile and easily handled.
Step 2 is a spell that rends the creatures apart into different "aspects" which are stored in specially prepared jars. A creature is shredded down into different types and quantities of aspects according to what it started as. Generally a creature, like an imp, will give one and a half times their hit points in aspects of different types and qualities.
Step 3 & 4 are similar to the first two steps except the spells are different and mortals or petitioners are used (usually larva). This process provides what are referred to as "bases" or the starting foundation of a new pokemar. A mortal generally gives up twice their HD, but requires a lot of energy to rend (big xp cost for evil PCs willing to do this). While petitioners provide four times their HD for weaker bases. While bases made from mortals are generally stronger and more robust they often retain memories of their former existence and are more difficult to handle.
Step 5 is where the real creation begins. A base is taken (well usually several using chained spells and techniques to cut costs) and bound to a physical "control object". This forms the link that allows the future possessor of the Pokemar to control the creature. The link is similar to that of the one between a master and familiar but weaker, and altered to block out any pain the creature might experience from being transmitted to the master (don't want them feeling empathy for the things).
Step 6 involves taking the newly bound base and combining it with different aspects, as well as shaping and moulding the creature into a new pokemar.
Step 7 is the final brainwashing and inspection of the new Pokemar before it is packed and shipped out to be sold.
Alta'na quickly found that doing all this on his own to be too time consuming and has recruited other fiends and mages (not just loths but any evil spellcasters that he feels he can "trust" or control enough to give up some of his secrets to) to help in the production. All of the steps are closely guarded secrets and the raw materials are the most jealously guarded of all. The loth has set up five different "factories" three on the lower planes (The Waste, Gehenna, and Baator while one is on the Astral and the fifth is on the prime. A sixth was built in Carceri but was destroyed when an upper planar raiding party composed of lupinals and a few aasimar came across it. This is were the aasimar mage Hazerbaro supposedly stole several formula involved in the creation of the Pokemar. Hazer's methods do not destroy other creatures to create his version of the Pokemar but this greatly increases the cost by many times.
Well I think I'll post a few example Pokemar as I make them up. Here is the first one. A small fast fire type. Feedback is welcome as always.
Firrenat
Tiny - Fire Elemental
HP: 1d3+1
Initative: +7 (+3 dex +4 Improved Init)
Speed: 20, Fly 70 (average)
AC: 15 (+2 size, +3 dex)
Attacks: +3 Bite, +3 Stinger
Damage: Bite 1d3 and 2 fire, Stinger 1d4 and 2 fire
Face/Reach: 2 1/2ft., 2 1/2ft., by 2 1/2ft.
Special Attacks: Stinger Bomb
Special Qualities: Fire Subtype
Saves: +3 fort, +4 rflx, +0 will
Abilities: Str: 4 -3, Dex: 16 +3, Con: 12 +1, Int: 5 -3, Wis: 10 +0, Cha: 10 +0
Skills: Hide +6, Listen +6, Move Silently +4, Spot +4
Feats: Improved Initiative
Stinger Bomb (Ex): After making a successful stinger attack the Firrenat may choose to take 1d4 -1 damage to detach its stinger leaving it and a small explosive pod embedded in the target. The pod explodes on the following round doing a further 1d8 fire damage plus 1d4 damage from the barbed stinger working its way further into the victim's flesh. The stinger does no more damage on the subsequent rounds but still may deal a further 1d4 damage if it is not removed with a successful heal check DC 10. The stinger regenerates at the normal rate of natural healing; once the damage done when it was detatched is healed the stinger has regrown.
That little guy won't have much of a chance of hitting, but if he does he packs quite a wallop!
That little guy won't have much of a chance of hitting, but if he does he packs quite a wallop!
I havent put that info out yet because I'm still thinking on it.
A. I want the price low enough that it could become a fad down to even the middle and lower classes in major planar metropolitian areas. (Watersdeep would be an example). That means at most a few hundred gold.
B. I want to provide a good deal of magical abilitiies with each one to make adventurers willing to use them. That raises the price considerablely.
C. I'm waiting to make up a few more so I know a good range to start with. Also I'm going to make up some low-end (aka "rejects") and weak examples that would be sold for much less.
Ideas and your own creations of pokemar are welcome 
Sworcon
Small Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 1d3 +3
Initiative: +1
Speed: 5ft
AC: 15 (Dex +1, Nat Armor +3, Size +1)
Attacks: +6
Damage: 1d8 +2
Face/Reach: 5ft by 5ft/5ft
Special Attacks: none
Special Qualities: Fire Resistance 5, Cold Resistance 5, Moderate Fortification
Saves: fort +7 Ref +2 Will +1
Abilities: str 14, dex 13, con 16, int 6, wis 5, cha 14
Skills: Perform +3 (dancing), Spot +8, Tumble +7
Feats: Combat Reflexes, Dodge
The swordcon is one of the most common Pokemar with its outstanding traits being that it is simple and strong. It Appears to be a longsword with a bulb where the hilt should be. On the other side of the bulb is a small point, not large enough to really do any damage (1hp). The swordcon can attack with either side but almost always uses the longsword blade. The bulb is studded with three rows of eyes spaced equally around the sphere. The middle row goes around the equator between the two blades and the other two are about halfway between the points and the middle row. It moves by hopping and balancing on its points either the longsword point or the spike point. It is able to hover a few inches above the ground for short spurts a few seconds at a time and it does so often as it moves. In combat it swings itself around in a manner that is very similar to someone wielding a longsword.
Moderate Fortification - This creature is resistant to critical hits 50% of the time as if it where wearing fortified armor (dmg 3.0).
Bladeach
Tiny Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 1d2 +1
Initiative: +8
Speed: 20ft
AC: 19 (Dex +4, Nat Armor +3, Size +2)
Attacks: +5, +3/+3
Damage: 1d4 +1, 1d4 +1/1d4 +1
Face/Reach: 5ft by 5ft/5ft
Special Attacks: Spin Slash
Special Qualities: Fire Resistance 5, Cold Resistance 5, Moderate Fortification
Saves: fort +2 Ref +4 Will -1
Abilities: str 12, dex 18, con 13, int 3, wis 5, cha 8
Skills: Jump +4, Spot +6, Tumble +9
Feats: Weapon Fineness (blade), Ambidexterity, Two Weapon Fighting
Appears to be a small mettle orb with two dagger blades coming out opposite each other on its axis. The diameter between these blades is covered with small mettle studs. Over the rest of the orb it is covered with sixteen or so small eyes evenly spaced apart from one another. It moves by bouncing on its points or spinning like a top. It also moves by jumping and bouncing on its studs and blades and like a monk its jump is not restricted by its height. Like its longer bladed cousin it too is one of the most popular types of pokemar and many trainers have made fearsome competitors out of the bladeach.
Moderate Fortification - This creature is resistant to critical hits 50% of the time as if it where wearing fortified armor (dmg 3.0).
Spin Slash - When spinning like a top a Bladeach can charge an opponent without drawing an attack of opportunity striking for 1d8 plus its strength modifier as a melee attack and then bouncing off in another direction. After striking the bladeach must make a tumble check with a DC equal to twice the damage it delt, or lose control and bounce off in a random direction for half its move, as well as being considered flat-footed on the beginning of the next round before its initiative. To determine how it bounced roll 1d6. On a 1 it ricochets off to its right from where it charged, on a 2 it goes to the right and out, 3 moves it strait backwards 4 to the left and out and 5 strait to the left. On a six it falls in front of its opponent and loses all of its spinning momentum. On a 1-5 it only loses half. It takes a full action to reach full spin.
Pokemar Items to Buy
Holding Sphere 275gps - This is the standard device used to hold and control Pokemar. It is a small sphere big enough to hold in one hand. Upon command (either a word or button (+50gps extra)) the sphere will release one of the Pokemar creatures held inside. The creature is able to attack immediately. The sphere can hold two creatures at once and the holder simply thinks of which one to release, otherwise one creature is released randomly. A second command word or button press recalls the creature. It may make a Will save DC 20 to resist and it must be within 10ft to be recalled. While inside the sphere, the Pokemar heal 1 hp + their con bonus (if positive) per day. Spheres cannot be used to hold anything other than Pokemar as they work with enchantments built into the creatures when they were formed.
Some spheres are better than others. Improvements mean greater costs and add things like more room, faster healing, and other abilities. Lesser Spheres cost less but might only be able to hold a single creature and might only keep the creature in stasis and not actually heal it at all.
Food Suppliment 1sp/5doses - While most all pokemar are able to eat normal food and almost all drink water and breathe air they all still need to have parts of their magical essences replenished in order to properly heal. The standard holding sphere does this automatically but without a sphere that allows healing a pokemar must rest and heal on its own. In order to do that it must have this supplement given to it. One dose allows it to heal one HP over the normal rate.
New Pokemar:
Most trainers buy their Pokemar without knowing exactly what kind they are buying. Many will buy several at lower prices and trade the good ones or sell them. The lesser ones are used for practice as sparring partners. Some trainers have even wounded lesser Pokemar to make them better targets. Most of the time a new Pokemar will be thrown in with the purchase of a sphere for a few extra gps (low +50, standard +150, high +300) depending on the quality of the creature.
A pokemar most of the time is bought will still in its "egg," which is effectively a holding sphere that is only able to hold one pokemar and then breaks after it is released the first time. Eggs come in five standard grades.
Lesser 20gps - These are the runts that are considered barely salable and almost all of them will have several flaws. Some trainers like to buy these and nurse them to health. Others like to use them as food or training fodder and others can't afford anything better. There is a lower level than lesser but with lesser the creatures are guaranteed to at least to be alive and be able to survive.
Low 100gps - These are smaller creatures with the occasional standard and high mixed in to promote sales. The basic quality of the creature is guaranteed (abilities and skills with in + or - two points of their average and having all special abilities and feats). If a creature is found not to meet these standards then it will be replaces with another at no charge.
Standard 150gps - This is the quality that the pokemar factories strive to produce. The quality is guaranteed and if the egg is opened in the shop it is purchased the buyer is usually given the right to see what the first egg contains and choose between it or another standard unopened egg. Also the same guarantees for low grades apply to standard grades.
High 650gps - A strong creature is always given with a purchase of a high egg. The pokemar is either a very rare type, or a normal type with several extra HD and/or good abilities.
Greater 2000gps - These pokemar are infused with more aspects than normal and are almost exclusively bought by "professional" handlers. While still somewhat random eggs are selected with the promise of the creatures inside having certain traits such as elemental affinities and strengths. The are nearly always replaced if the buyer is not satisfied.
All pokemars are sold complete. Just that some are still in their eggs and sorted according to their power levels while others are sold outside of their eggs and are barted for according to their abbilites.
uhm did things die here?
The forums were busy last week and slow this week. I have a sneaking suspicion that it's all related to some cosmic schedule of tests and exams, but having left academia a while ago I wouldn't know any more.
The pricing info is good. I like the idea of calling them (Magic) Eggs instead of pokeballs or whatever. IMC I have a spell called Hatch that creates miniature monsters or items that are particularly useful in a given situation. I'll post it here later. Perhaps it could be integrated with the pokemars to give them temporary boosts or something when they crawl out.
Keep it up.
The pricing info is good. I like the idea of calling them (Magic) Eggs instead of pokeballs or whatever. IMC I have a spell called Hatch that creates miniature monsters or items that are particularly useful in a given situation. I'll post it here later. Perhaps it could be integrated with the pokemars to give them temporary boosts or something when they crawl out.
Keep it up.
Thanks. I'm sorta caught in that time as well.
Anyhoo I've been balancing against the urge to go with it as a joke and just call them pokemon, but also have the idea that they could be useful in a real even serios game as well.
*and the yougoloths start to chuckle*my dear god it is starting all over again take cover !
Well that's what I'm doing. As far as rules for creation I've not been working on those so much because the making of these creatures is such a secret. Even the good aligned aasimar isn't telling much partly for fear that while he draws essence and aspects from creatures that are willing, with out perminantly harming them and then paying them for it, he knows that the easier way is to gather aspects by destroying other creatures.
That way it adds a nice plot hook to the deal for several adventures and new useful things for PCs to use.
Name: Nega
Size - Type: Tiny - Magical Beast (Undead Traits)
HP: 2d6 (1HD)
Initiative: +3
Speed: 1ft, fly 40ft (perfect)
AC: 15 (+3 dex, +2 size)
Attacks: +4 claw, -5 bite
Damage: claws: 1d4-3 + 1d6§, bite 1d6-4
Face/Reach: 5ft by 1ft/2ft
Special Attacks: Nega Bolt
Special Qualities: Undead traits, immunities, miss chance, cohesive fortitude
Saves: fort +*, refl +6, will +4
Abilities: str 2, dex 16, con --, int 4, wis 14, cha 5
Skills: +8 hide, -1 intimidate, +6 listen, +4 search, +6 spot
Feats: Weapon Finesse (claw)
*see cohesive fortitude
Negas appear to be small balls of dark gases in the shape of a creature that has a short snout with sharp teeth connected to a long reptilian tail with two small arms ending in sharp claws coming out from just behind its maw. It does not appear to have eyes or a distinct head or body. The gasses billow in this shape becoming more cohesive and detailed with its scales appearing almost as hard as black gemstones or more blurred and whispy like a cloud depending on the creature's mood.
Temperamentally, Negas are often compared to cats by their handlers and trainers and in combat they often use the tactic of hiding, stalking and pouncing. They also tend to have a stronger evil nature than most other Pokemar and half the time will take an alignment one step towards evil on the alignment axis away from their master if the master is not evil.
Negas are quite popular among handlers who are also spellcasters and deal with undead, and a few have been commissioned and made unbound as pokemar for use as servants, pets, and real familiars by some spellcasters who like negative energy or undead.
Claws - A Nega's claws are bathed in an aura of negative energy and deal an extra d6 of subdual negative energy damage per every two HD.
Nega Bolt (Su) - A Nega may fire a bolt of itself, taking 2 damage to itself in the process, at its target as a normal ranged attack dealing 1d8 +4 damage, half of which is negative energy, no save. When it fires it "spits" or "breathes" the bolt from its mouth.
Undead Traits - The creature has all standard undead traits with the exception that it is subject to critical hits and if turned or rebuked, and still bound as a pokemar, it returns to the last pokemar receptacle it was stored in if it is within 20ft, or the closes receptacle within 20ft if the last one is not within range. Otherwise it is turned and rebuked normally.
Immunities - Negas are immune to cold and cold effects, take half damage from electrical, and are immune to piercing weapons that are not considered blessed, or that do not have a magical bonus of +1 or greater.
Miss Chance (ex) - All physical attacks against the Nega have a 25 percent miss chance. Ghost touched, blessed, and weapons with a +3 or higher magical bonus are not subject to this miss chance. This chance is rolled separately with one for cover or other reasons.
Cohesive Fortitude - A nega's fortitude bonus is based off of its current hitpoint total when it makes the save. The bonus is equal to its current HP minus 4. As a Nega takes damage its fortitude saves become weaker.
Name: Lord Jasis' Hound, or Novent Hound
Size - Type: Medium - Magical Beast
HP: 1d10 +2
Initiative: +0
Speed: 45ft
AC: 14 (+4 natural)
Attacks: +3 bite, +3 claw, +4 tail lash
Damage: 1d6 +2 bite, 1d3 +2 claw, 1d4 +2 tail lash
Face/Reach: 5ft(10ft tail lash) by 5ft/5ft
Special Attacks: none
Special Qualities: Child empathy, scent
Saves: fort +4, refl +0, will +1
Abilities: str 14, con 15, dex 10, int 4, wis 12, cha 6
Skills: Climb +4, balance +1, jump +6, listen +11, scent +12, search +0, spot +11, swim +6, wilderness lore +3
Feats: Track, Weapon Focus (Tail Lash)
These creatures are named after their most famous trainer from some prime world (on the planes generally known as Novent's world) where pokemar became popular, one Lord Jasis Novent II. The lord commissioned a custom pokemar when he was ten, a gift from his father for his coming of age, to certain specifications and then bought several dozen more over the years giving them to friends and managing to set a trend on that world making the hounds a popular status symbol. The hounds are known for being extremely faithful and are often given by noble parents to their children partly as protectors. The creatures are also instinctively gentle around humanoid children (or what it thinks is a humanoid child) and suffer a minus four penalty to initiative if ordered to attack a child making a DC 15 Will save to obey such an order if they are told to attack to kill. Otherwise a hound will instead attempt to trip or subdue any child it is ordered to attack or perceives as a threat to its master.
The hounds come in many "breeds" and are most of the time made to look like hounds that their master's like. A few are distributed in the random eggs and these more common hounds have a body shape similar to that of a grey hound with long fur in speckled browns, whites, grays and blacks, with the occasional red. The creatures also sport a series of stubby boney spikes running along their spine and down their tail in a single line. The hounds tail is also once and a half as long as its body from nose to haunch.
Child Empathy - The hound may make a spot, listen or scent check with a DC of 15 to recognize if something is a humanoid child or an older humanoid such as a halfling. If the humanoid is trying to disguise itself as a child its disguise check is used instead for the DC. The hound does not need to make this check for people and children it already has met and knows and it gains a +5 bonus to tell if someone is trying to disguise themselves as someone it knows; this bonus increases to +10 if the hound has been in contact with the person for at least an hour on average each day for a year or more. Furthermore the hound gains a +10 bonus to its diplomacy checks with children that it has known on good terms for more than a month. As said in their description the hounds will attempt not to harm children and must make a will save to willingly do so under a command. Note the DC for this save increases by +5 if it knows the child, +10 if it knows the child well.
Dude! It was a joke game.