Oh, dear. I think that pretty much sums it up.
*checks list*
.
.
.
Yeah. It does.
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
So what would be the best forum to start a 'random chatter/free association' thread whose only purpose is to acquire enough posts to outstrip this thread? 
I think this needs to be done. The longest thread around is "Beating a dead Arcadian Pony" Hopefully we can end its reign here. Three rules, true everywhere on the forum but which bear repeating.
1) Your vendettas do not belong here. Don't take this thread over with silly squabling. That misses the point.
2) Don't post multiple times in a row- that is, let someone else talk before you respond. Don't just talk to yourself, no matter how much you want to be a factotum 
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
Let the aimless meandering begin.
CHEESECAKE!
- 475 reads
Sun, 2005-04-10 10:43
#3
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Sun, 2005-04-10 11:47
#4
Re: Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread&qu
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
Firstly, I take issue with your use of the phrase "aardvark eggplant". In the Dungeon Master's Guide II, page 15, paragraph 12, it clearly states that an aardvark cannot multiclass to an eggplant until it has been both roasted AND pickled. Your formulation is lacking. I challenge you to prove to me that an aardvark can be a plant. It goes against the entire design philosophy of D&D as well the Animals & Vegetables sourcebook.
Secondly, I'd never contribute to something as juvenile as a thread that just goes on forever.
...
Argh, dangit. 
Sun, 2005-04-10 12:26
#5
Re: Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread&am
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
Firstly, I take issue with your use of the phrase "aardvark eggplant". In the Dungeon Master's Guide II, page 15, paragraph 12, it clearly states that an aardvark cannot multiclass to an eggplant until it has been both roasted AND pickled. Your formulation is lacking. I challenge you to prove to me that an aardvark can be a plant. It goes against the entire design philosophy of D&D as well the Animals & Vegetables sourcebook.
That was the last edition. The revision (reference: Complete Guide to Insect-Eaters) makes it possible with a few well-chosen feats.
You really should know your sources before holding up an argument like that.
Sun, 2005-04-10 18:54
#6
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
... it clearly states that an aardvark cannot multiclass to an eggplant until it has been both roasted AND pickled.Pff. If it's been pickled the build would be completely broken. That would completely negate the drawbacks of the eggplant. As a matter of fact, you shouldn't be able to roast and pickle from a purely fluff perspective, and only a DM who's completely new to the game would allow such a thing. That both are possible is a sign that the designers have no regard for the DM or for balance.
(And on a somewhat more serious note, what is going to be in the DMG2? I'm unclear what more needs to be done that requires a second DMG...)
Mon, 2005-04-11 11:53
#7
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
... it clearly states that an aardvark cannot multiclass to an eggplant until it has been both roasted AND pickled.Pff. If it's been pickled the build would be completely broken. That would completely negate the drawbacks of the eggplant.
I question your motives in contradicting me! You obviously have an ulterior motive because...err...it goes against the design philosophy of the designers that only I can interpret. And besides, the errata for Animals & Vegetables will prove me right when it comes out in 2 years time. 
Oh, wait, silly squabbling belongs in that other thread. I forgot.
---
Seriously though, I believe the DMG2 will have a lot of world-building and monster-building rules for novice DMs. How to create CRs, create racial classes, and more uber-rules. Without knowing the content fully, I'd still say that Arcana Evolved is probably a better bet if you're a rules junkie (which I'm not).
Mon, 2005-04-11 12:11
#8
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Fools! You will never defeat the once and future beaten Arcadian Pony! The pony will rise again, most likely from the expanding gasses in its rotting corpse, and explode over what ever sod is stupid enough to give it that final whack!
Mon, 2005-04-11 22:11
#9
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
I'm sorry, but my multiclassed Slaad/Salad would absolutely destroy your pitiful "Aardvark Eggplant". He has the powers of four out of five dressings with only 1000 Island out of his grasp.
Mon, 2005-04-11 22:21
#10
Soccer-tease
Let me answer your question with a question.
1000 Island out of his grasp.
Is that the Ethereal one?
Pff. If it's been pickled the build would be completely broken. That would completely negate the drawbacks of the eggplant. As a matter of fact, you shouldn't be able to roast and pickle from a purely fluff perspective, and only a DM who's completely new to the game would allow such a thing. That both are possible is a sign that the designers have no regard for the DM or for balance.
Why don't you just play as Homsar and simplify things? I mean, doesn't he get to substitute eggplants for pumpkins randomly?
Fools! You will never defeat the once and future beaten Arcadian Pony! The pony will rise again, most likely from the expanding gasses in its rotting corpse, and explode over what ever sod is stupid enough to give it that final whack!
What if I gave it a lapel pin that radiates positive energy?
1) Your vendettas do not belong here. Don't take this thread over with silly squabling. That misses the point.
Does that mean that I can invite Mr. Pawnbroker and Miss Crosstrade into this thread and neither will explode? *Note: A'kin is cool*
Cool thread idea! Can I join? I love a challenge! (big evil grin)
Will the references never end?
=D
Mon, 2005-04-11 23:04
#11
Re: Soccer-tease
Let me answer your question with a question.
1000 Island out of his grasp.
Is that the Ethereal one?
He has Ethereal Ranch Dressing. 1000 Island is Astral, it's in your mind man! It's all in your mind! MWEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEEE!
Tue, 2005-04-12 03:19
#12
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
mmmmmmmmm, Limbo salad.
Tue, 2005-04-12 08:23
#13
Re: Soccer-tease
He has Ethereal Ranch Dressing. 1000 Island is Astral, it's in your mind man! It's all in your mind!
If it's Astral, shouldn't that be 1000-God-Island Dressing then?
Does that mean that I can invite Mr. Pawnbroker and Miss Crosstrade into this thread and neither will explode?
He's already here...
<---avatar
Tue, 2005-04-12 11:17
#14
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
I like middle eastern food. It tastes funny.
Tue, 2005-04-12 11:31
#15
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
is it wrong that I am getting hungry ?
Tue, 2005-04-12 13:52
#16
Re: Soccer-tease
long live the pony!~
Tue, 2005-04-12 13:54
#17
Re: Soccer-tease
Fools! You will never defeat the once and future beaten Arcadian Pony! The pony will rise again, most likely from the expanding gasses in its rotting corpse, and explode over what ever sod is stupid enough to give it that final whack!
What if I gave it a lapel pin that radiates positive energy?The Pony has Greater Uber Turn Resistance and laughs at your pitiful lapel pin wearing it proudly!
Tue, 2005-04-12 14:16
#18
Re: Soccer-tease
Fools! You will never defeat the once and future beaten Arcadian Pony! The pony will rise again, most likely from the expanding gasses in its rotting corpse, and explode over what ever sod is stupid enough to give it that final whack!
What if I gave it a lapel pin that radiates positive energy?
Tue, 2005-04-12 14:25
#19
Re: Soccer-tease
Fools! You will never defeat the once and future beaten Arcadian Pony! The pony will rise again, most likely from the expanding gasses in its rotting corpse, and explode over what ever sod is stupid enough to give it that final whack!
What if I gave it a lapel pin that radiates positive energy?MUHAWAHAHAHAHAH!
Tue, 2005-04-12 14:52
#20
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
The 646th layer of the Abyss - The Flogged Pony - On this horrible plane, consisting only of a gargantuan rotting Arcadian Pony corpse and associated flies, rats, maggots and molds, petitioners are trapped in endless debates, grudges and arguments, the points of which have been long forgotten...
OR
Figurine of Wondrous Power (Flogged Pony) - Once per month, the owner of this small but smelly lump of rotting equine flesh may call forth a pointless argument that involves every intelligent being (including the figurine's owner) within a 100' radius. Be warned. The argument, once started is very difficult to stop. Only by making 2 consectutive Will saves against a DC of 30, can you escape the argument. If you remain within the area of effect after escaping the argument, you must make an additional Will save each round vs. DC 20+5/round to avoid being brought back into the argument.
OR
The Flogged Pony, Greater Power of Endless Arguments
Please, feel free to argue his (or her) stats endlessly right here in this thread, nothing would make him (her!) happier... I personally think the Flogged Pony could take on the LoP in under 5 rounds. In fact, I challenge anyone to prove me wrong. Proofs must incorporate published rules from Monopoly and cannot involve insect-eating vegetation.
Tue, 2005-04-12 15:14
#21
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
The 646th layer of the Abyss - The Flogged Pony - On this horrible plane, consisting only of a gargantuan rotting Arcadian Pony corpse and associated flies, rats, maggots and molds, petitioners are trapped in endless debates, grudges and arguments, the points of which have been long forgotten...
OR
Figurine of Wondrous Power (Flogged Pony) - Once per month, the owner of this small but smelly lump of rotting equine flesh may call forth a pointless argument that involves every intelligent being (including the figurine's owner) within a 100' radius. Be warned. The argument, once started is very difficult to stop. Only by making 2 consectutive Will saves against a DC of 30, can you escape the argument. If you remain within the area of effect after escaping the argument, you must make an additional Will save each round vs. DC 20+5/round to avoid being brought back into the argument.
OR
The Flogged Pony, Greater Power of Endless Arguments
Please, feel free to argue his (or her) stats endlessly right here in this thread, nothing would make him (her!) happier... I personally think the Flogged Pony could take on the LoP in under 5 rounds. In fact, I challenge anyone to prove me wrong. Proofs must incorporate published rules from Monopoly and cannot involve insect-eating vegetation.
My vote is for the first one.
Tue, 2005-04-12 15:24
#22
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
No it isn't.
Tue, 2005-04-12 15:30
#23
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Site: The Flogged Pony
This site appears to be a mountain-sized dead arcadian pony lying on its side locaded near the border of Gehenna and Baator. A foul stench eminates from the corpse parts of which are in varios states of decomposition, from freshly dead to bleached bones. Surprisingly a small city has sprung up around the corpse, its name currently under debate, and a huge number of libraries, court houses, universities, and other assorted academics have congregated there.
Within five miles of the Pony cutters are compelled (Will Save DC 10 negates) to belive their side of any arguement is right and continue on with that arguement as long as they possably can. Closer to the Pony, within a mile, the effect gets even stronger (DC 15). However, all knowledge skills made within a mile of the corpse gain a +1 bonus. Indeed many research and rhetorical activites are seemingly aided by being in proximity with the corpse and thus many scholars have flocked there.
Tue, 2005-04-12 15:31
#24
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
I changed the place because arguements and faulty logic seem to me to be more a devilish idea than a demonic one.
Feel free to add more. Or change or argue about it.
Tue, 2005-04-12 15:34
#25
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
No it isn't.
Yes it is. It clearly is. My research shows that it is within a 99.999909918 margine of error. What's your margin of error? Don't have one? tsk tsk.
Tue, 2005-04-12 18:29
#26
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
The 646th layer of the Abyss - The Flogged Pony
I have been there. Truly I have seen the light. Very funny.
NEW FEAT: Flogging the Pony (No, not that pony, you sick bastard!)
Benefits: Grants +4 to any pointless rules argument
Description: Grants a bonus to pointless arguments everywhere, but only if you're a petulant stickler....or a "professional freelance writer".
Designer Notes: This is really a copy of a feat that already exists somewhere, but I gave it a planescape feel. See if you can find it. </sarcasm off>
Gerzel: Stop talking to yourself, man! This isn't the pointless insanity thread.
Tue, 2005-04-12 19:16
#27
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Gerzel: Stop talking to yourself, man! This isn't the pointless insanity thread.
Hey! My insanity has a point!
Tue, 2005-04-12 19:47
#28
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
NEW FEAT: Flogging the Pony (No, not that pony, you sick bastard!)
Benefits: Grants +4 to any pointless rules argument
Description: Grants a bonus to pointless arguments everywhere, but only if you're a petulant stickler....or a "professional freelance writer".
Designer Notes: This is really a copy of a feat that already exists somewhere, but I gave it a planescape feel. See if you can find it. </sarcasm off>
Normal: You get no bonus to pointless rules arguments. If you participate in a pointless rules argument for a number of rounds greater than your Wisdom score, you must make a Fortitude save, starting at DC 15 and increasing by +1 for each cumulative round, or become nauseated.
Wed, 2005-04-13 11:37
#29
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Uh oh. If we're going to have a dead Arcadian Pony cluttering up things in this thread, I had better go check the disk space on the server!
Wed, 2005-04-13 20:29
#30
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
My pet Abyssal Monkey eats Arcadian Ponies for breakfast.
Thu, 2005-04-14 08:56
#31
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
mI pett munkee kan beet up yur pet munkee ani da uv tha week
Thu, 2005-04-14 09:34
#32
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
mI pett munkee kan beet up yur pet munkee ani da uv tha week
Thu, 2005-04-14 13:30
#33
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
dam strayt et can
go git hiz munkeemi monkee
beet et up
so i kan eet itz feet en a nis wit win sows with esparagoos
i lik esparagoos thei lok lik trez
or iz that brokolee?
Thu, 2005-04-14 14:03
#34
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
... radishes.
Thu, 2005-04-14 14:18
#35
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Apparently in ancient Athens, radishes were a prominent component of one of the punishments for adultry. The teacher who mentioned this refused to elaborate, but I gather it was quite painful.
Thu, 2005-04-14 14:21
#36
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
*blink*
DUDE.
Thu, 2005-04-14 14:35
#37
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
dam strayt et can
go g
it hiz munkeemi monkeebeet et up
so i kan eet itz feet en a nis wit win sows with esparagoos
i lik esparagoos thei lok lik trez
or iz that b
rokolee?Whooaaa, trippy dude!
That's almost as good as Eco-Mono's avatar....and by 'good' I mean 'crazy wild messed-up but froody cool'.
Thu, 2005-04-14 14:46
#38
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Apparently in ancient Athens, radishes were a prominent component of one of the punishments for adultry. The teacher who mentioned this refused to elaborate, but I gather it was quite painful.
I am going to have to ask around and figure this out.
Thu, 2005-04-14 15:07
#39
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Apparently in ancient Athens, radishes were a prominent component of one of the punishments for adultry. The teacher who mentioned this refused to elaborate, but I gather it was quite painful.
I am going to have to ask around and figure this out.
Or you could just Google.
Thu, 2005-04-14 17:27
#40
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Apparently in ancient Athens, radishes were a prominent component of one of the punishments for adultry. The teacher who mentioned this refused to elaborate, but I gather it was quite painful.
I am going to have to ask around and figure this out.
Or you could just Google.
I did.
Thu, 2005-04-14 18:15
#41
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Um. Yeah. That's as good as Egyptians and their lettuce.
Thu, 2005-04-14 18:40
#42
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Um. Yeah. That's as good as Egyptians and their lettuce.
Dang it! I'm going to have to google again!
Fri, 2005-04-15 06:18
#43
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
wow that is well ah well wow
Fri, 2005-04-15 08:08
#44
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
I've googled al ovir miself
Aniwon got ay shami?
Fri, 2005-04-15 08:18
#45
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
... given Jordarad's recent postings, I'm currently pondering the taste aspects involved in posting Gene Ray impersonations in response... :twisted:
Mon, 2005-04-18 11:53
#46
prove me wrong, i dare you
I have $10,000.00 that I will
wager that Cubicism transcends
and disproves Theism Creation.
I guess they don't teach the value of a falsifiable hypothesis in schools these days? This guy is perfect for a nutjob Signer standing on the corner of the Nic'Opena and yelling at the top of his lungs.
I'll take TWO DOZEN!!!
Fri, 2005-04-22 18:40
#47
Alright, stop me if you've heard this one...
So, five genies walk into a bar. Sitting at the bar is a glabrezu with green stripes, and a drunk thri-keen. So, things are pretty quiet for about twenty minutes, when suddenly the Thri-Keen start hopping around. Now the Dao isn't too happy with this, and he gets up to leave, when the bartender gets angry, because the Dao forgot to pay. The marid decides this is a good time to start trouble, and as the Slaad bouncer wakes up to extract the money from the Dao, the Marid throws the poor Janni at the Efreet. This is when things got messy...
Wait... you wanted a punchline? Whatever for?
Wed, 2005-06-01 19:45
#48
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
So... Kumquat anyone?
Wed, 2005-06-01 20:35
#49
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
Kiwi. Definately kiwi.
Wed, 2005-06-08 15:54
#50
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
At least Clueless didn't reveal any shocking truths regarding ancient Goths and their kumquat punishments. =/
Wed, 2005-06-08 15:56
#51
Barmy Ramblings (AKA "Let's Make a longer thread")
...
You've seen some of my random trivia posts on ENworld haven't you?
1) Your vendettas do not belong here. Don't take this thread over with silly squabling. That misses the point.
2) Don't post multiple times in a row- that is, let someone else talk before you respond. Don't just talk to yourself, no matter how much you want to be a factotum
3) Roasted Aardvark Eggplant.
Let the aimless meandering begin.
CHEESECAKE!
Cool thread idea! Can I join? I love a challenge! (big evil grin)