Who Is DeVorn? Three Prominent Sigilites Speak
Who is DeVorn?It is a question that has plagued many of my colleagues for quite some time. The sudden and inexplicable appearance of his name amidst stories told by the poor and destitute of the Hive - especially among the Xaositects - has remained an inexplicable mystery for nearly a decade.
What we know for sure is that DeVorn is always portrayed as both immensely intelligent and random, escaping from situation after dangerous situation through a combination of treachery, creativity, and cleverness. His stories (which are favored exclusively by the lower-class and denizens of the Hive) detail his constant success in fooling both the Harmonium and the Mercykillers (in one story, he even convinces a Harmonium officer to attack a Mercykiller officer by tricking him into thinking it's really DeVorn in disguise) as well as many other dangerous and frightful denizens of the Multiverse, including the Githyanki and even (in one particularly far-fetched yarn) the Illithid.
Other than this, details about the Xaositect are sketchy. Some claim he's just a story told by those in poverty to brighten their days, while others claim he's an amalgation of several real characters who have been combined into one person to make remembering the stories easier. Several books and pamphlets (many released by questionable Xaositect factioneers) are acredited to him, but considering the wide variety of styles and formats these written works invariably span, it is likely that the true authors are just attempting to cash in on DeVorn's momentary popularity.
And he is quite popular. 'A body DeVorn couldn't peel' and 'A trap that'd catch DeVorn' have actually become common sayings amidst some groups of children throughout the Hive. Perhaps the most telling sign of DeVorn's popularity is the Harmonium's reaction to his name - which is to either immediately deny he exists or to promptly hit the person who mentioned him (sometimes both).
So who is DeVorn? With this question in mind, I have interviewed three specific individuals from three different walks of life to attempt and acquire a real answer to this question. The transcripts from our dialogue (again, thank you for your patience, Martin) are included here without further editing (beyond meager introductions) for you to draw your own conclusions.
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Britton Banks is a well-established member of the Fraternity of Order's Presidium for the Investigation of Morale-enhancing Policies and Services. He is a graying-but-healthy gentleman who is dressed sharply and speaks in quick monotonous sentences."Thank you for having me, Mr. Banks. I am aware that you do not have much time to spare, so I will try to make this swift."Britton: Thank you.
"Obviously we are here to discuss the recent popularity of DeVorn, a hero to many Xaositects and destitute members of the Hive. His stories have gained a strong foothold among the poverty-stricken especially, and are often told to children. One of the primary purposes of this inquiry is to discover whether or not DeVorn is actually a real person, and if so, to discover his identity. Your thoughts?"Britton: The matter is simple. DeVorn is not a real person, but instead a clever ruse created by the Xaositects to further popularize such reprehensible activity as deceit, duplicity, and lack of respect for authority figures."So it is your contention that DeVorn is actually a constructed fictional character meant to foster disobedience and defiance amidst the poor?"
Britton: Precisely. My associates and I have discussed the matter for some time, and we are in works to create our own 'fictional character' for the purposes of competing with DeVorn. That is why I wish to use this occasion to announce the release of the Fraternity of Law's own personal mascot, Stark S. Smith - the law-abiding citizen.
"I assume you're going to be releasing several stories concerning this 'Mr. Smith' and the various mishaps he falls into?"Britton: Of course. Children shall delight at tales involving Stark S. Smith paying his taxes on time and obediently following the law, as well as outsmarting his Xaositect oppressors by doing what he is told. I am currently working on a particularly popular story involving Stark S. Smith's brush with the Harmonium after they mistake him for a villainous drug-pushing Xaositect who is also a murderer and a rapist. It is quite suspenseful. We average listener interest at 13.5 percent."Gripping. I assume he manages to escape the Harmonium and go on to prove his innocence?"
Britton: Don't be silly. He calmly explains the situation and produces three forms of valid ID to prove his point before receiving a reprieve.
"I see. Again, thank you for your time and thoughts, Mr. Banks."Britton: Would you like to hear one of Samuel S. Smith's stories? It won't take long. I have one of the transcripts right here...
"Err... that's at least 600 pages of paper..."Britton: Of course. This story is entitled 'Samuel S. Smith brushes his teeth'..."I'm afraid I have to go. Again, thank you."
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Renard Twine is a notable Sensate factioneer who specializes in the telling of stories. He can often be found both collecting intriguing tales and writing them down in his book (a thick leather-wrapped manuscript which contains far more pages than it appears to) in any local kip. He is young in appearance but old in mannerisms, possessing a mixed elven heritage that gives his eyes a slight almond slant. Mr. Twine has made it his life work to gather stories from every culture he can encounter, especially the mixed culture of Sigil, and write them down so they can be preserved for future generations to experience.
"Mr. Twine..."Renard: Renard's fine, my good man.
"Yes. Renard... As you know, I'm chiefly interested in discussing the matter of DeVorn. As a Sensate chiefly interested in the gathering of tales and folklore of various cultures, I have been told you have taken it upon yourself to collect many of DeVorn's stories for the purpose of study and comparison... As someone who has read many of DeVorn's stories, I am interested in your personal opinion: Do you believe DeVorn exists?"
Renard: Most certainly and without a doubt.
"Would you care to expound why you've come to this conclusion?"Renard: I've met him personally. Quite amiable chap. Managed to clear up quite a few misconceptions in some of the tales about him...
"You're claiming that you've actually met DeVorn? Can you tell me about his appearance, or what he looks like, or what species he is? These are all the subjects of quite a lot of conjecture, and..."Renard: Well, to be quite honest, it varies.
"Varies upon what? Is he a shape shifter?"Renard: It varies on what specific story I'm currently researching. You see, DeVorn's actually a type of 'mythological figure'... It's quite interesting. If you tell a fictional story often enough and to enough people, and if it's entertaining enough and catches on, it sometimes can actually become real. The characters from these stories can just pop out of the Planes as real as you or I and start generating even more stories about their exploits.
"Are you trying to tell me that DeVorn's only real because people tell stories about him in the Hive?"Renard: Exactly. It's happened countless times before. Many of the hierarchies of Gods you take for granted started as nothing more than a clever little story... Why, there's even a prevalent theory that the Illithid themselves are the result of a popular horror novel by a fellow Sensate, P. H. Heartjob. Everything you know about them and their existence, their entire history, all the proof of their existence... It only recently appeared a few years ago because of the popularity of these books, which feature squid-like monstrosities eating quite a number of Harmonium...
"Well, I'll certainly agree that the Planes have proven susceptible to suggestion, but-"Renard: Susceptible to suggestion? More like the Planes are an alcoholic who goes home every night with any handsome berk who's got a smile and a half-decent tale. Think about it. If the Planes shift to fit the current paradigm of belief, who's to say the Planes themselves - and, in fact, all their inhabitants - aren't merely the result of a somewhat popular line of books which have generated enough interest amidst their readers that the Planes took shape in the way they did? You and I, Sigil, even the crazy Xaositects, all of us could just be the result of an over-worked author's imagination that caught on and became wide-spread belief.
"Now you're just being silly."Renard: Yeah, that's what you all say. But you just wait. One of these days, I'm going to find out who started these stories... And I'm going to sit down and have a talking with them. I'm-"I think that's all the time we have. Again, thank you for your time, Mr. Twine."Renard: It's just Renard."Whatever."
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Finally, this set of interviews would not be complete without sitting down with a real live Xaositect - or at least an ex-Xaositect member - to discuss just who DeVorn is. I managed to find a fairly calm and clear one who was willing to discuss this matter. His name is Werner, and he claims to have been a member of the Disciples of DeVorn, a small Xaositect/Anarchist splinter group who is predominantly obsessed with causing chaos through mischief and mayhem by any means possible. After turning stag, he has become the subject of considerable resentment amidst the Xaositect order and several attempts have been made on his life. Mr. Werner is a balding man who has an unhealthy obsession with cleanliness and linen sheets. I met him in the Bleaker's Asylum, where he was currently resting after a 'psychotic episode'."First, Mr. Werner, allow me to thank you for allowing me this interview. It's my understanding that you are rarely willing to speak with guests of any sort, and-"Werner: Get on with it."Yes, of course. You are, or were, a member of the Disciples of DeVorn, a reputed cell of Xaositects-turned-Anarchists-turned-Xaositects again who were obsessed with defying authority through any means possible. It was only recently that you were pardoned for your affiliation with the group after becoming a turn-coat, and..."Werner: Bar that, addle-cove. You want the dark on DeVorn or you want to rattle your bone-box?"Ah, of course. I'd like your thoughts on him, and whether or not he had any hand in the founding of the Disciples, and if you've actually met him, and..."Werner: DeVorn is the sharpest blood I've ever met. The man could peel a body out of every stinger they had and get them to thank him for it in the meanwhile."Then you've met him? Can you tell me about him?"Werner: Not much to tell. Cutter was savvy, but last I heard he tried t'bob the Lady. Ended up Mazed. That was after the Hard-heads scragged me, though, so I'm not so sure."But you have met him, correct? And he was the leader of the Disciples of DeVorn?"Werner: That's what he said he was. And this was before everybody and their mum down in the Hive knew his name."What was he like?"Werner: Sharp. Always workin' his brain-box. Some of the peels he pulled..."Tell me what he looked like?"Werner: Funny thing 'bout that, berk... I can't remember much. I know that sounds peery, but it's the truth. I met him maybe four or five times, and every time... He was tall, I think, but other than that..."What did he ultimately want? I mean, what was the purpose of the Disciples of DeVorn?"Werner: Only DeVorn knows, I guess. We were in it just for th'kicks, and it felt good to stick it to the Hard-Heads and the Red Death. Guess it caught up to us, though, huh? I think there was something about a woman... Other than that, mostly we just made trouble. "What sort of trouble?"Werner: Y'know, second thought, I'm thinkin' this whole talk wasn't a good idea. Tell you what, berk. You come back tommorow, we can talk more. My bones feel tired and I'm gonna go have me a lay."All right, Mr. Werner. I'll be back tommorow to ask you more questions."Werner: Yeah, sure.-----Despite attempts to acquire an oppurtunity for a final interview with Mr. Werner, I learned (much to my dismay) that the ex-Xaositect had disappeared from his cell later that night and had yet to be located. Whether or not Xaositects are to blame or he simply got bored of the Asylum remains yet to be seen, but as of this publication no sign of Mr. Werner has shown.
Once again I am left with almost no information concerning the existence - or nonexistence - of DeVorn beyond pure conjecture. I can only hope that others will have more success in this matter than I have.
- 426 reads
That's really clever and great.